Year 25
On my 24th birthday I woke up early, seaside in a tent, with the most beautiful view of the ocean only feet from where I had just slept. I laid in silence reminiscing on my last birthday and the deep disappointment I had felt and wanted to make this year different. I jotted down some things on my phone that I hoped to take into my new year of life with me. Things I hoped would become truth in my life. I honestly didn’t think much about the list again until a couple months later, when life got hard. I wondered what I had written down when my life had felt more consumed with joy than sadness, and if there was anything for me to take away from it. The list ended up becoming a road to healing. I longed to carry my list with me through the year, despite the hard left turn my newfound 24th year shortly took (s/o to #2 on the list for turning that around).
This year instead of dreading my birthday, I decided to dive headfirst into celebration of my life. With the healing I had experienced in the months leading up to turning 25 I felt there was a LOT to celebrate. I felt new! I asked friends to send me cards so my mailbox would be flooded with thoughtful words (& it was—25+ cards!!!), my sweet boyfriend made the whole weekend special and so catered to everything I love (including a lakeside dinner with my fave foods!), and I even got to perform in a cabaret with friends on my bday. It was the dreamiest of days.
Leading up to the big day, I thought back to my 24th year list and re-read it. I was amazed to see how all 24 things on the list were now true of my life. It was as if speaking these words over my year aided in them coming to fruition. How. Cool. My mind was awake to what I most wanted to be true for my life.
Keeping up with the (new) tradition, I woke up early again this year on my birthday eager to speak some life over my year. This time inside of my cozy studio apartment, on the 39th floor overlooking the west side of Chicago with a hot cup of coffee and my journal. I sat and pondered last year’s list some more and then came up with 25 things I hoped to take into my 25th year.
Though this year feels different. As the list was pouring out of my brain onto the paper, I was noticing that I was mainly writing things that were true of my life at this point. True because of the healing I’d experienced in the months leading up to my birthday. This year’s list is a culmination of what is now true of my life and what I hope remains true moving forward.
Some truth to take into year 25:
1. Heartbreak can be healed, and the pieces put back together are even more beautiful than before
2. Lexapro is just the best
3. You have no idea what is around the corner waiting for you
4. There is an army of support surrounding you
5. Being in love and being loved is the greatest gift (s/o Dan)
6. Your secret life is more important than your social media life - how you live in secret will pour over into all you do
7. Gratitude can change your day- and you have so much to be thankful for
8. Asking for help is brave (& scary!!)
9. Laughing your way through a minor inconvenience is a lot more fun than the alternative
10.Cherish your family and all that comes with them
11.Lincoln Park is the superior Chicago neighborhood (sry!!)
12.Eating 3 meals a day feels really good—and snacks are THE best
13.Kind & thoughtful words nourish your soul
14.You can’t replace genuine friendships—hold tight to those you love
15.Being around little ones brings great joy, curiosity, and whimsy into your life
16.Serving others is never a waste of time
17.You have a gift of noticing those around you who normally go unseen
18.Saving money can be fun
19.God deeply loves all of who you are and who you are becoming—believing this changes how you live every day
20.Random facetimes are a love language
21.Take more time to notice all you’ve accomplished
22.When you get enough food water and sleep, you don’t need four cups of coffee a day (shocking news)
23.Being outside is healing
24.Getting messy is fun
25.Living generously is always worth the cost
My hope with the list (this year) is to remember what it is that’s important to me as I venture through my new year of life. Like all of us, I can be easily distracted and get caught up in the small things. Having a big picture vision for my year is helpful in aiding me to become the human I deeply desire to grow into. If there is anything I’ve learned in the past year it’s that growth doesn’t just happen, it’s something we are an active part of. And who knows, maybe I will find myself pondering this list a few months down the road, thankful for the ways that growth continues to produce hope and a path to healing.
August 24, 2022